Someone who understands

This morning I had the pleasure of hosting a wonderful Canuck place counsellor. We spent an hour and a half talking. I love that it didn't feel formal at all. It was very casual. We just chatted. I didn't have to explain the whole medical history of Layla. She obviously did her homework on our story. It was so nice not to have to spend 3/4 of our time explaining that. She wasn't here to talk medical either. Instead we talked more about the present. How we're coping, struggles, joys, sorrow... Some things I would be scared to share with others. She not only understood but made me feel like they were normal thoughts, not the sort only horrible mothers think. If I found a random counsellor online they might help me deal with some of my current struggles but this woman literally only speaks with parents of "medically fragile kids". She actually put words into my mouth I couldn't on my own. It was like she was in my head.

I spent some time talking about the ifs and buts of going back to work. One of my comments was that I don't know if I want to work in customer service anymore. I don't think I have patience for people like I used to. I used to be so good at that. She guessed that it's because going through everything we have in the last year you change and start to realize what's truly important in life.. Head on the nail. Suddenly you really don't care how important it was for someone who absolutely needed to get to Calgary for a meeting who is now  missing it because it's my fault the plane can't fly in heavy fog.. I laugh but it's so true. I'm finding it so much harder to relate to others' problems. It's terrible I know. But that's where I'm at. When you are told to discuss quality of life for your daughter, how much you want medical professionals to intervene.. your whole world changes. There are so many things we've had to talk about that I never ever wanted to talk about for my kids. Aaron and I both feel it's made us quite cynical.. at least in our thoughts. I hope we don't portray that too much.